Children and Screens

Screens as Shelter—and Stewardship: Helping Children Reclaim Emotional Strength

When a child erupts after their phone is taken away, it’s tempting to label it defiance. But often, what we’re seeing is something deeper: a child who’s lost their emotional anchor.

For many kids, screens have quietly become their go-to comfort. The phone isn’t just entertainment—it’s their distraction from boredom, their balm for sadness, their escape from anxiety. It’s doing the emotional work they haven’t yet learned to do for themselves.

But here’s the rub: screens were never meant to carry that weight. They’re tools, not therapists. And when they become a child’s primary coping mechanism, we risk short-circuiting their growth. Emotional strength isn’t built through escape—it’s built through presence, patience, and practice.

That’s why screen time must be limited—and earned. Not as punishment, but as stewardship. Children need to learn that comfort doesn’t always come instantly, and that resilience is forged in the quiet spaces where no screen can reach.

So when we set boundaries, we’re not just managing behavior—we’re guiding formation. We’re helping children:

- Sit with boredom or frustration without rushing to distract.

- Name their feelings and talk through them.

- Practice calming strategies—like breathing, movement, or creative play.

- See screen time as a reward, not a right.

And most importantly, we model this ourselves. We show them what it looks like to pause, to reflect, to choose presence over pixels.

This is the slow work of soul care. It’s not always easy. But it’s holy. And it’s worth it.